i find myself in this silent hour as dez now sleeps soundly with a full tummy.  i’m left here wide awake with my mind going a thousand miles per hour as the snow strangely flickers about in the crisp Keller air.

here is where I find purpose.  leaving all the worries of the things that I must do for tomorrow and enjoying the little subtleties of the now.  my life has been busy as this blog has laid here untouched.  i felt guilt.

the snow reminds me of just how precious the now is.  snow in texas will surely melt and be a distant memory.  the snow awakens my purpose.  and melts away the useless feelings of guilt that plagues me.

it’s ok that i have been consumed with the sweet new little grins, coos, hums, and cries of this little one.

its ok that i have been wrapped up in my children and spending time fostering the new bonds that are shared between them.  my 3 beautiful children.

tonight we all guiltlessly lounged snuggly on the sofa watching american idol as i twirled lana’s hair.  i got lost in her perfection and somehow forget about the toy that i tripped over to get to my spot of the sofa.  I forgot about the mound of papers that is waiting to be accounted for, for taxes. i let go of the worries of the bills that must be paid. and i forgot about that nagging to-do list. as i embraced the now with complete surrender.  i studied her laugh.  it is loud and fluent.

i realized how she has eagerly matured and taken on her important roll as big sister flawlessly.  she tenderly studied her little brother with utter love and attentiveness.  and nate studied them… and i caught Andre studying us as i studied them.  we all sat on our family sofa and love abounded us.

i guiltlessly love the snow!

We’re feeling the spirit! With October being Down syndrome (Ds) Awareness month I felt lead to create a special to promote the incredible beauty and awareness for the over 350,000 individuals living with Ds, including my daughter Lana.

GIVE-AWAY TIME!!!

In honor of Ds Awareness Month we’d love to give back and photograph as many people with Ds as possible, so spread the word!  We’re giving away a beautiful 8×8 custom hardcover album ($440 value) with a paid session to the lucky “Spread the Word” winner.

To enter the contest simply blog, tweet, facebook, myspace, email,… you get it, spread the word! Here’s how you get your name entered into the contest for a chance… ahem, many chances to win.

3 chances: contact us right away to reserve your session

1 chance: follow us on twitter @ficklezeal then tweet the following

Win a Custom 8×8 Album from your Down Syndrome Awareness Portrait Session @ficklezeal for details visit www.fzphotography.com/blog

1 chance: become a fan of FickleZeal Photography on Facebook and post some Ds Awareness Portrait Session love

1 chance: leave a comment on my blog with why you’d like to win this beautiful memento with your session

3 chances: email us a sweet photo for us to share on our blog of your loved one(s) with Ds

5 chances: for each referred session that is completed

Contest ends October 31st and the winner will be announced November 10th!

We’ve had something come up with our little one, Lana, that has taken me away from FickleZeal for a bit… well I hope it’s just for a bit.  Please if you pray, pray for Lana, if you think, keep your thoughts on her, if you meditate, please meditate on Lana’s good health.  Please all of you keep her in your thoughts and/or prayers.  At this time, I don’t  wish to share details as my emotions are ALL whacked out.  I hope by this time tomorrow I will be able to say false alarm, but if not then our faith will remain in tacked while we get our battle gear on and face what we are intended to face.

If you are client of ours and are waiting on anything from us, I beg your forgiveness and will get to it all once I get my feet on the ground again, hopefully Wednesday!!!  If you need something urgently feel free to send an email to me at jenna at ficklezeal.com titled urgent.

A post without a photo would be a shame, so here’s a share of our precious baby girl Lana.

Along, the journey of parenthood we are blessed with many things, but amongst one of the many blessing of being a parent of a child with Down syndrome (Ds) are the deep connections and bonds that we create with other parents of children with Ds.  I’m so fortunate to have made wonderful friends in this community, if you will, that I could not live without.  One being my friend Kristi.  She recently also became the “nanny” of my children for several days a week.  WHAT A BLESSING!!!  Her children are all adorable, but Matty, OH MATTY has stolen way more than a few pieces of my heart.  Seeing him and Lana play together in the mirror or doing wherever, being mischievously CUTE, warms me to the core.

Ok-ok, to the photos!

Meet Matty!  Isn’t he just scrumptious!!! & his buddy, ahem, dad Brian.

His adorably-spunky sister Ashlyn!

Kristi (and Ashlyn), my friend and Nate’s “best-friend”, as he says.

Note: Check back in September for part two of this beautiful family, when their oldest son Damian returns from his summer activities.

Kristi- thank you so much for taking care of my kiddos and loving them as your own.  I am so thankful for all that you do, but most of all I’m thankful for your friendship!

If you know me at all you know that I love, Love, LOVE shooting children with Down syndrome.  Seriously, every time I’m behind my camera and I have a beautiful child who also happens to have Down syndrome there’s a part of my heart that literally melts.  Their unique beauty and being that unfolds in front of me and my camera is so majestic.  Photographing them gives me this “you complete me” feeling.  As if this is one of the things that I was born to do, to capture, explore and translate their story.  Music plays in my head, we begin our conversation in our secret language, and part of my heart just melts!  I never want the shoots to end, but I know when they must, whether it’s 45 minutes into the shoot or 3 hours (my poor Lana, heehee). They are all such a blessing! Not defined by Ds, but enhanced by it.  I’m a major fan of their uniqueness and their ability to steal a peace of my heart.

This weekend I was privileged and honored to have two families scheduled that each had a child with Ds.  One on Saturday and the other on Sunday, neither of which did I not leave a puddle of my heart behind.

Sneak peak:  Matty and Hailey!  You steal my heart!  I adore you!

kids. bed. air. laughter.

I love the simple things in life, but I love it even more when my kiddo’s do. Just before nap time today my kids made my day with their beautiful expressions of love and laughter. Their laughter fills my heart with more joy than I can express and helps me to remember to slow down and enjoy their youth.

Another quick sneak peak. This one is for Lana’s sweet friend Karli. Karli was on the go throughout all of Mercer Arboretum & Botanic Gardens in Houston. I had a great time capturing her active spunkiness and the love that her parents have for her and each other. Beautiful!

Today is a national awareness day to promote awareness and initiate change of the hurtful effects of the word “retard(ed)”, the r-word.

Something that has been pressing in my heart since Lana was born.  After speaking with countless doctors and therapists, I quickly learned that a word that is used throughout society to describe someone that is acting dumb or goofy was now tied to my beautiful daughter.  I must say, it hurt.  At first, it hurt that the doctors would dare describe my daughters condition as such, but after much thought and research I wanted to reclaim the word for it’s intended definition.  I wanted all of my friends and family to stop the misuse of the r-word.  I posted blog posts, sent emails, had many conversations informing people of how hurtful the word was when used in inappropriate careless ways.  I also designed and created t-shirts to hand out and sell.  I’ve been spreading the word for over three years now, but today I’m happy to see the cause is nationalized.

Soeren Palumbo has made a huge impact in creating awareness since his brilliant speech that he delivered to a gymnasium full of his high school peers and faculty and received a standing ovation.

The use of the r-word is offensive and hurtful, even when it is inadvertently used.  It is hurtful to the millions with mental retardation as well as their loved ones.

I find it interesting that insulting somebody by using such words as “Alzheimer… Cancer… AIDS… etc” carelessly would not be taken as a joke nor lightly yet, using another disease such as retardation as an insult is common among society.

It is NEVER appropriate to use the words “retard” or “retarded” in a careless or an insulting way.

I encourage you all to be more conscious of the words that you use and hope that you will take a pledge to stop saying the R-word on www.r-word.org.